Productivity pointers

When I talk about productivity, I mean it somewhat universally speaking, because I’d like to discuss increasing productivity in general, whether it be at your place of work, for an assignment if you’re a university student, or for maybe just your creative pursuits. The reason I chose to write about this is that I've recently been having a little trouble being as productive as I want to be, so I thought if I decided to write about this matter it would help me get some ideas out about the subject and in-turn help me to be more productive.

There are bound to be tons of different tips, tricks and techniques about this topic, but I believe below are six highly cornerstone points...

· Believe in what you’re doing

Have you ever found yourself halfway through a task but no longer particularly motivated to finish it? This happens to us all, and if we actually end up finishing the task what normally urges us to finish is that we want to finish something that we’ve started. That’s not the way to go. It is so much better to have a clear belief all the way till the end that what you’re doing is worthwhile – this is what’s truly motivating, and will help us to complete the task well and properly.

It is a not so invalid belief that if someone feels not motivated anymore to do something, then they intrinsically don’t think it is worthwhile; however this is usually not the truth. Sometimes, yes, people genuinely deep-down no longer think something’s worth accomplishing, but most of the time the lack of motivation comes from when they lose sight of the rewards accomplishing the task will bring – unlike when they started, where they saw them crisp and clear. So if you find yourself in this position, lay or sit down, and visualise the rewards, reinforce your motivation and come back to your work with the desire as when you first started it.


Not only is belief in what you’re doing important, belief in yourself is. We have to believe that we possess the ability to accomplish the task at hand. If a person thinks something is impossible, what will make them go for it? It’s like some English person liking the idea of being president of the United States, but trying to do that (since you have to be American) would seem kind of pointless - why be motivated to try to do something you know isn't possible? But the same goes for just something you think you can't possibly do (but you might be able to do); for example, you not believing you can do an A-grade piece of work for university, this won't make you motivated to try for one.You might want to try positive visualisation to help aid the belief you can accomplish the task. I’m not saying be delusional and keep trying to do something regardless of the bleak possibility of a triumph. It is up to you when you give up, but I think it’s fair to say a lot of things are worth a good attempt, and you might be more capable than you think, so give it a go. This tip basically comes down to your level of motivation to accomplish the task. The more your motivation, the harder you will work, hence the better your productivity.


Remember, have a good belief in the work and yourself.

· Have a focus

When working it’s sometimes easy to get lost in the task and head off on a tangent. As an example, I’ve found myself whilst working on a website, playing about with the way the logo looks for a long time, not realising that if I took an astute think about it and regained some perspective, what I would really want to be doing is working on the website layout. How well you’re doing a part of a task is an aspect of productivity, but also is working on the part of the task that’s best to do. I use what I like to call directional meditation if I find that I’ve lost my ‘bearing’ so to speak, or if I’m about to start a task and don’t know where’s best to begin.



· Try to be stress-free

If someone’s stressed out, they’ll perform worse at lots of things.

Being stressed makes you more susceptible to lacking belief in the work you’re doing and also losing your focus. For this reason, try to be fairly stress-free when working. If you find yourself a bit too stressed-out, take a break, check out the next tip below...

· If you’re in a bad state, round the work off and take a break

Are you feeling low? Angry? Stressed? Frustrated? We are only human, and it’s sometimes very hard indeed to quickly flip yourself into another mood, in this case, a mood more conducive to high-productivity. If you think you’re in an inappropriate mood, round the work off and take a break. What I sort of mean by ‘round the work off’ is finish all the remaining tasks that are left, which require little thinking, and take a break from the work. When you feel better come back to it later and continue from a refreshed state of mind.I feel it’s a fine idea to round-off a piece of work before taking a break, because this gives you an increased sense of achievement come the end of the work session. Leave the heavily analytical or creative jobs for when you feel good, but while you aren’t in a great state you may as well do the necessary leftover monotonous tasks you can complete without thinking much.



· Keep improving your technique

When it comes to doing a routine job, such as something you’ll have to do again and again, it’s pretty beneficial to consider, even whilst you’re actually working, ways you can carry it out more efficiently. For example, whilst working in Microsoft word, why not learn a few short-cut keys at each visit; pressing ctrl + s to save, ctrl + o to open a file. These kinds of advancements in the way you work will undoubtedly boost your efficiency. I know it’s a fairly obvious point to make - “Find faster ways of working.” But really, what I want to emphasise here is to keep making a conscious effort to do this.



To begin with, you’ll be working slower and getting less done, because you’ll be trying to learn new ways of working as well as actually having to do the work, but by investing this way, you’re playing the smart-game and your constant improving efficiency will pay-off greatly in the long-run.

Better working techniques aren’t necessarily obvious to discover (obvious as like I mentioned, short-cut keys for microsoft word), and so sometimes it’s not easy to derive them as you’re working. In this case, it’s worth just setting aside a little time specifically to find ways to advance your efficiency.

It’s very easily done to ignore the prospects of thinking up new ways of working, by going with the attitude of ‘just getting on with the job to get it done’. But think of it as like investing your money for good returns later, instead of spending it all to satisfy yourself at the present.

· Cut out distractions

Is your hair bothering you? Is the sun in your eyes? Is it noisy around you? Keeping away from these types of distractions can be very beneficial to your productivity. Even cutting out fairly small distractions will help you work better; the sort of distractions that it’s easy to let niggle at your concentration while you work, such as your hair flapping down in front of your forehead, or the room you’re working in being uncomfortably hot.

Like the last pointer I made (keep improving your technique) this pointer is a rather obvious one too, but also like the last pointer, I am trying to emphasise that you should make a conscious effort to get rid of the kind of distractions that you’d otherwise just put up with. If it’s a little hot in the room and you have to occasionally wipe sweat from your forehead, at these moments you are a little bit distracted and your thoughts won’t be as directed on the work; so in this case, make the conscious decision to later buy a fan.

What I am not instigating is that people should go all obsessive compulsive and try to make their work environment perfect, in such a manner that they actually start paying more attention to this than the work they’re doing. Just get rid of the distractions that are small and up, ignore the really minute ones, because there will be plenty of those.

So there we are (yay!)...

· Believe in what you’re doing
· Have a focus
· Try to be stress-free
· If you’re in a bad state round the work off and take a break
· Keep improving your technique
· Cut out distractions

I believe the above are six very crucial pointers for high-productivity.

When's my next post going to be!?

Well I guess this is my next post, but the next kind of well-thought-out self-help post will be coming sometime within the next few days. It's about how to be more productive, which is a bit ideal because I've not been so productive on this blog recently.

Man, this is a short post.

The Blissfully Unaware Chicken

Since I’ve been back at my family’s house for the summer, I found an unlikely source of inspiration - the last remaining pet chicken we have on the property.



The two horses have been moved to the paddock, meaning the chicken and geese have had to be allowed free reign outside, so they won't find themselves flattened by the horses. This inherently allows them to go anywhere; a mile from the house (not that they would give up readily available comfort and food here), or even inside the house (they have sneaked in on a few occasions). Now, we don’t mind this development; in actual fact we quite like having the birds hang about outside, they in fact serve partly as aesthetic features added to the outside area, but, they aren’t the only animals roaming around the house outskirts.




There are four cats and a dog. Granted, the dog is relatively civil towards animals of all kind, but the cats... cats are cats! Isn’t it uncontrollably in their nature to hunt after other animals like mice, rats, and birds?! The two geese are respectably a bit too big to take on, but the chicken looks about the same size as the two biggest cats.

What kind of inspired me about this situation is that the chicken is completely unshaken by their presence - unshaken by 4 masterful, stalking, hunting, killing machines (in-effect, lol). In actual fact the chicken is so dismissive of them, it’s almost dominant of them. You'll find them moving out of it's way instead of visa versa. The chicken surprisingly seems to be higher in the pecking-order.



Admitably the cats are just a bit wary of attacking a bird a similar size to them, and since they get cat food guaranteed like twice a day from us, it’s quite understandable why they won't risk getting injured. However, I was taken not by the chicken's ignorance of the potential danger, but by how this is an asset to the animal. Via obliviousness the chicken is effectively getting on with it's life, rather than living in constant fear. There's an obvious lesson to learn from this...

A lot of us fear shark attacks when we're in deep water. I think it's fair to say most of us have heard on TV and the like, that shark attacks are very unlikely, however I believe still a good deal of us are fearful. If you're quite an overly apprehensive person, learning to let go a bit more would enable you to have a more enjoyable life.



I suppose the chicken is just unaware, not brave or philosophical, but the affect is still the same.
What I’m not saying here is that we should all become anarchists to common sense and cautiousness, but perhaps we should take a think about if we are in fact too cautious in our lives, so much that we don’t permit ourselves the freedom to live fulfilling lives.

The idea is to try more frequently to step out of a subjective look at things, and of course think more objectively. Take a look at authoritive statistics on the likelihoods. We often can wind-up thinking something nasty is more likely to happen then it actually is, and that it's nastier than the reality.

Imagine a person is about to make a speech to about thirty people they barely know. They're very worried about the possibility of completely freezing during the speech or something, and they think that'll be bad because everyone will think of them as complete idiot. But the reality is that they aren't likely to go blank during the speech, especially if they're backed up by some queue cards (for instance), the fear that they'll take looks at the cards and still be completely frozen is just silly and pretty irrational. Even if they find themselves frozen, surely it wouldn't be hard to say something like “I’m so sorry, my minds gone blank, I appologise”. People will be a little taken by that, sure, but not half as much as the person thinks.



If there’s an area in your life that you believe you should relax a little more about, try to act like my chicken! Live more for the pleasure of the moment, and not that the chicken does this, but ease-away all unwanted fears. Learn to be mindful of your present moment, and stop thinking so much about possible hazards of the future, be kind to yourself and wind down a little more.

It'll get easier...

If you persevere with this, you'll turn into a more relaxed person naturally. This is about consciously taking steps to alter your habitual thinking - the brain will be changed for the long term if you keep it up.

Meditative techniques I use (part 1: positive visualisation)

A little while back I said I was going to perform an experiment. The experiment was rather unremarkably named “Social confidence gaining practice”. I said in the post I'd do half an hour of medative visualisation everyday day for a week, and in it I would visualise myself doing well in social situations. Here’s an excerpt of that article:

"...It's very simple. For half an hour each day, I am going to lay down on my bed and imagine social situations that are likely, or that have already happened with me, and run through them like I were in the situation. However, of course I'm going to run through them, like I were a cool charming sociable person..."









Of course also I said I’d get back and post about if I gained any positive results or not. Well, welly well well well, I did :D. Even though I believe I skipped the practice on a couple of days, after the week I seemed to be more at ease whilst socialising. It’s important to note that the placebo effect may have played a part in this, but I honestly think not that much.

Quite recently I realised that what I'd been doing was a well-known form of meditation called Positive visualisation. I later decided to pinpoint the usual forms of meditative thinking I engage in, that I've sort of accumulated over the last year. 6 types came up, and ever since I made this kind of 'breakthrough', I’ve been able to make ever increasingly good use of those, now chartered, forms of meditation. This is mostly because now I know which precise one is best to use in whatever disposition I may find myself, where meditation would be helpful.

What is meditation...

To meditate is to focus your thoughts in a certain way. When meditating it is best to cut out distractions around you if you can - so by laying down or sitting on a comfortable spot, and closing your eyes in a quiet place, this will help your practice. There are ways of simply ignoring noises around you, but this is harder than simply being in a place of little distraction.

It has been scientifically discovered that some monks have slightly changed physical brain shapes due to the meditation they undertake (that's quite a big testament right there). Meditation, the way I see it, is simply a way of using the mind very effectively by being especially focused. You can change your current emotional state with meditation, you can figure out things you wouldn’t normally, and you can change yourself and your mind with meditation for the long-term.

In this post, I’m starting with the one I attempted to gain social confidence...

Positive visualisation

As I exclaimed earlier, this is a greatly well-known form of meditation, and you'll find that a lot of top athletes use it to help them at their sport. To sum it up, it is imagining yourself doing well at something (like I had been with socialising). I believe the more vivid you imagine yourself doing well at that something, the more the process will make positive changes in your mind. Positive visualisation helps supply your mind with a strong and clear picture of what you want to acomplish. It creates and strengthens pathways in your brain that will be used when it’s time to execute the task.

My preferred method...

I have my own preference when it comes to the exact method used, but use whichever way you find suits you best (because we're all different). I like to imagine myself in third person perspective, ergo I’m kind of looking at myself from outside of my body. I then imagine that the me I’m seeing has the ability to do well at the chosen task. Following that, I simulate the version of myself I’m watching, accomplishing the task proficiently. Afterwards I step into that version of me, and imagine myself inheriting the new ability, and subsequently acting out the task successfully in first person perspective. I may decide to run through several times, the whole of this meditative process or simply just the first person perspective part.

Maybe physically act out some of it...

I sometimes to an extent, physically act out the task. Whilst visualising about badminton (for instance), I might sometimes move my arm as if I were swinging the racquet; I might even be grinning because that’s part of what I would imagine myself doing whilst playing well.

Feel good...

When visualising, perhaps try to feel a sample of the good feelings you'd get if you were actually acomplishing the chosen task in reality. This may help reinforce the positive changes in your mind, but also, exercising this will help to make the visualisation task more enjoyable - meaning most likely, you’ll probably want to keep it up, because it won’t be like a chore.

Try to be in a tranquil place...

As I’ve said near the beginning of the blog-post, it’s a good idea whilst meditating to be sat or laid down with little noise in the background. White noise is also fine, such as a refrigerator humming. In actual fact, if there’re random noises going on in the background (like people talking, the television downstairs, etc) you can use white noise to drown some of that distracting sound out.

When to use this meditative technique...

If you have an event coming up, for instance, a presentation in front of your class at university, set aside some time in the days running up, to positively visualise making a successful presentation. You may spend 20 minutes after lunch each day for a few days, before you go to bed, or whenever you feel is best. Another time undergo some positive visualisation is when you want to improve your performance at something that regularly occurs in your life, for example, talking to customers at the place you work - so then you may want to think about doing this form of meditation a few times a week (for at least 5 minutes apiece). Think about something in your life that you’d really want to be better at, then use this practice to help you.

The third vlog...

For this vlog, I tried to really step-up the quality from the second one.

I had a problem submitting the video to youtube because it was too long, so then I segmented it to 2 parts.

Movie maker was really being irritating, continually freezing and the like. I will try to make my next video soon and with much much better software.

Lets 'av a watch eh...

Part 1


Part 2

The next vlog installment!

After much anticipation (sigh, I wish), here is my second video log!

(I think a solid improvement on the first)



I need to probably plan a little more before video blogging, and I need to be more confident and charismatic. The third video will hopefully show largely increased levels of all of those.

I start vlogging! :)

Er... I start vlogging yay! Or is it vblogging?

I don't really know, I doubt it matters much.

SO ANYWAY...

Here's a little bit of preamble before the video:

I've not really managed to be able to do a video blog before. I've basically been too stressed out to finish anything. But now, I have dropped trying to be a perfectionist so much, and I've just chilled out and thought more optimistically. It worked! I wouldn't say it's a particularly good video, it has a few okay bits in it I suppose, but I can build on this performance for next time.

Social confidence gaining practice (what a crap name)

I am going to perform an experiment!

I have anxiety problems, and this interfiers with my ability to socialise. I overthink when I talk to people, and because of that it's not so much of a natural flowing experience for me. So, I was thinking about a certain kind of practice I can do on a daily basis, to not only make me a less embarassed and more fluent talker, but to also help make what I say more effective.

It's very simple. For half an hour each day, I am going to lay down on my bed and imagine social situations that are likely, or that have already happened with me, and run through them like I were in the situation. However, of course I'm going to run through them, like I were a cool charming sociable person.

From what I've heard about the brain, this is extremely likely to work if I do it properly and stick to it for a while.

An odd thing to mention here, is that imagining social situations where you're getting along with people well, is actually quite enjoyable. Vividly imagining experiences can bring about to a certain degree the same feelings and emotions as if the experiences were actually happening.

I'm seriously going to give this a go, for like a week. I'll make a post afterwards to give the results of the experiment.

I'm not sure what picture I should insert at the end of this blog post, so here's a picture of some random hateful comments I saw on youtube. Why not eh...

Things aren't going so well right now

Today I spent most of the day in bed. It's interesting how many things you can just sleep off.

I felt anxiety that nearly started a panic attack off today. I've been feeling this for the last week on and off, and I'm pretty scared about it. My OCD level hasn't been as high as this for a while either.

I'm going out tonight to the student union venue (it's pretty nice actually). I have a lot of my clothes washed, and my shower has been fixed and it's able to give out hot water now - so I'll be able to be washed and look presentable.

I guess it's time to start reading my OCD help book again:













(I just took that shower I was on about, lol)

I'm meant to be taking an exam tomorrow - it's my last exam. However, because I'm disabled I can get it moved to the next semester :D. Thank goodness because this week it's been hard to revise because of my anxiety.

Well, as I'm typing now it's 21:26, I better go and buy some beers.

I was going to make a post about goal setting, but I hadn't managed to try fully what I wanted to experiment with this week (again, due to anxiety), so I made the choice of making this post instead.

Directional meditation

When I'm bored in a day, I look to what I call 'directional meditation'.

I lay on my bed like this...





- I might cross my legs, I might not, it doesn't matter how you lay, just I find it useful with my hands in the gay way they are for some reason. Of course, close your eyes.


My mind is a lot more focussed when I'm doing this meditation. Meditation is by it's nature "To think or reflect, especially in a calm and deliberate manner."

My thoughts are all hemmed towards the problem. Usually I think of what I should be doing in the day; that is normally when I find myself at the computer, knowing about my disorganised life, but not quite knowing where to begin to put it on the right path again.

I see this as an incredibly simple thing to do if your confused about what direction it would be good to take about something. I say "direction" because it's not possible to figure everything out, so then, it's a set of directions I'm meditating for, not intricate steps of what to do.

To me, it seems like a really helpful thing to do at some point in the day if you want to. I'm not saying spend hours on it, or even tens of minutes - I'm normally done in about 8 minutes.

Fear, a great paralyzer

I've known for a little while now that if I am to have a really nice life and achieve loads of the things I want to, I will have to let go of a massive load of fear.

Fear is useful sometimes, it keeps us from doing potentially dangerous things, such as... "I reckon I can climb up that building". I think fear is a reaction, that prompts us into doing things, or seizes us into not.

But it seems to not work logically sometimes. For instance, you'd really like to ask out this girl, but you're too shit-scared to. You might have even gone through the 'worst that could possibly happen' analogy, and your rational side knows that it's a possible win for the cost of nothing - but the fear keeps on pumping.

...

What I am not trying to get to is, "Face everything you fear!", because in reality, there are a lot of rational fears. So by facing everything, would that mean go and wrestle a fully grown tiger? It would, so no, do not face everything. Instead, face everything you don't want to fear.

However, you have to be wise in which fears you want to conquer. I would say I am a bit more frightened crossing the road than the normal person, and I want to become that little bit less frightened; but how do I know if I've gone too relaxed about it (and may get knocked over)? It's a judgement call I believe, one that relies a lot on wisdom.

Examples of fear restricting people and their lifes

A person who:

loves animals, but can't get a pet dog because of a phoebia
doesn't make many friends because they fear rejection
can't enjoy sun-bathing properly because they fear wasps

Ways to get over fear in general

You could just push yourself more each day to be brave. But a way of you not forgetting about your mission would be to join an extreme sport perhaps.

The vision of this blog

I'm having trouble motivating myself to make posts in this blog.

It's not that I don't have much that I want to say, it's that I don't seem to be motivated much to post.

Where have I been going wrong?

I believe it's because (and this was very much so for the smoothies post), I am thinking more about "lets get another post done", instead of "lets write what I want to write". I'm viewing this as more like a choir than a nice hobby.

The goal should not be, "I want something really cool in my life, like being a popular blogger". It should be this instead, "I want to write what I want to write! Popularity will be very much welcomed, but if I am to be popular, I want to be popular due to people liking what I want to say, NOT what I think I should say".

So, number 1, my vision should be a deep and personal vision. Not a shallow vision, where I'm trying to be popular, for the sake of being popular and getting an ego boost.

Somewhere else I've been going wrong, I have been quite pessimisic about the posts I've done. Thinking like this will only sap at your momentum.

So then, number 2 - from now on I'm going to be a lot more satisfied and positive about the posts I will put on the blog. This will help build momentum - the feelings that what I am doing, is heading towards the vision.





- I just noticed after I took the picture, that it looks like those two characters from pulp fiction are about to shoot at me! OoooOOoo.

Smoothies...duh!

I eat a decent amount of fruit in a day!

It all started nearly a couple of months ago when, hmmmm obviously -> I started making myself smoothies!

My advice is you get into a routine of making a smoothie every morning. You can do that, or you can buy them. My preference which is implicit in this blog post already, is to make them.

They are nutrition bombs!

No...

They are preciously packed pure pleasing potables! Fuck me that was full of gay.

This is the fruit I effectively eat for breakfast...









!I don't even really like fruit!

I should mention that there are a few blueberries thrown into the conconction too. I couldn't find them in the fridge this time though.

If you think your diet sucks, drink smoothies. It's easy. Even if you don't like the taste, just down a pint or so a day. Hold your nose if you have to.

I personally drink smoothies because I don't really enjoy eating fruit.

Be thankful we live in a time where smoothies are possible. Without convenience machinery like a blender, we'd have to cut and pulverise all the fruit up manually. This would be a bit of a waste of time, since that's what our mouths are for.

My battle against paranoia

I have OCD. I get really paranoid about things that are nonsensical to be paranoid about. For instance; I can't swim in a lone swimming pool, because I fear that there might be a shark or a crocodile at the deep end. I bought a ring the other day, and I keep thinking that it's radio-active, and I've going to get radiation poisoning from it if I wear it...




- sigh, probably ionising my hand as I speak (fucking paranoia)


I thought today I should make a little post about paranoia.

It's been quite a recent development for me, where I've been thinking more positively about things, and tried to be a more relaxed person, and it's actually been working. However, something I've really only just come to is how optimism doesn't just cover 'thinking about things that are situational in a positive light', but also it stretches out to 'thinking about the possibilities of things in a realistic light'.

Here's what I mean...








- Click on the picture so you can read it







I drew that picture myself by the way. I'm suprised I didn't make an error in it, but I suppose I'm the most skillful person in the world! (That's delusionally positive)

I think 'optimism' is about taking a situation, and interpreting it in the most helpful way to you.

People will probably wonder why I have bothered to mention the delusionally positive way of interpreting the situation, since only people with a Bi-Polar condition might think like that. But I feel that it helps to outline that when it comes to predicting the eventual possibilities of what something means (like a bald patch), it's best to just be realistic about it, and not interpret it in the most positive way, like you should when you are interpretting the situation itself, not just what it might mean (the bald patch itself; thinking that it might actually be cool to have a bald patch for example).

When it comes to predicting the chances of things happening, it's very important you keep realistic, so that you don't go so paranoid and cynical and get stressed and feel horrible, and also so that you don't go delusionally positive and wind up acting on the delusion and putting yourself in a really bad position (for example, thinking you can beat up this gang of football hooligans all by yourself, and then acting on that, and having the crap beaten out of you).

It is optimum to interpret factual situations in the best light (like: "I didn't pass that exam, but I think this is good for me, now I will be inspired to try harder"), and it is optimum for you to interpret uncertain situations in a realistic light, so you act the best way on them and put yourself into the best position you can... hence optimism.









Situations you know exist - interpret in the most positive way

Possibilities - interpet pieces of evidence in the most realistic way (unless you're acting on faith, which is another ball-park, wait a second, I'm British! I meant another cricket-pitch. Because faith doesn't need evidence, and it's not a bad thing (I'll go into this some other time)).

I'm tired but want to write

I'm a little hungover today, but I think it's so good to have a blog and write in it a lot. It's kind of like a diary in that way, except it's open to everyone looking at it.

I know that there are different techniques about how to do good blog posts, well, probably, I haven't checked that out really. I am infact trying a technique for this one. The technique is (I heard this off a film one time) write what you want to say with your heart, then go back over it and edit it using your head. That's what I've done to make this blog post. {No I actually haven't, I decided not to go back over it when I got to point CBA (cannot be arsed)}

Writing is kind of a really cool thing, in my opinion. It's sort of similar to when someone does a well prepared speech. They arent just coming out with those well-crafted words in that order, off by heart. There's been a lot of thought put into what they are going to say. A piece of writing is the same in that way, and it's a chance to convey things to people in a really well structured way. Not only to people, but to ourselves. I mean, I can look back over what I've just written, and if I do, I'll probably get a better understanding of what direction I should go in with this article. I'm not sure how to describe the enrichingness of writing, because I'd need to think about this a lot more. It's only been something that's crossed my mind relatively recently; and it's not yet kind of formlated in my mind in a logical order yet (the explanation of why writings good).

If you don't have a blog or a diary, they are wicked! Get one

Ahhh :D, I've just packed a lip. For those that don't know what Dip is, it's smokeless tobacco. It's not chewing tobacco, because god knows how that will destroy your teeth.

{Point CBA}

Take a look at da picture...





- This dirt-like substance in the tin... is dip.








- The stuff between my (gorgeous) bottom lip and teeth... is dip.






I think I've conveyed the idea now.

It's from America. I think it's banned in the UK because it's thought to appeal too much to children. Naturally, the USA doesn't seem to care much about this. (And I'm talking about the government, not the people).

A sunny day

I'm feeling rather hot today, the sun is out, and my long hair's not helping the matter either.

I look outside and dotted about are groups of people in the sun, relaxing and having fun. I'm here in my room alone; I suppose that's the outcome of only having 3 friends, heh, one of them being my ex-girlfriend, who doesn't really fancy seeing me right now.

Over the last few weeks I've noticed a steady rise in my OCD activity. I know that now I really should start ignoring it to get the level back down... And I will. I shouldn't have let it slip to begin with.

Ah, today I bought a cooler box type thingy, complete with 2 ice packs. I plan to make a smoothie after every drunken night's antics and put it in the cooler box, so that when I wake up in the morning I can roll over and grab the smoothie, for some nice nutrients to get me going for the day. Otherwise I'll stay in bed awake for a couple of unnecessary hours.

I went and got some lavender essential oil today too!... Wait a minute, did that exclamation mark make me look sad?... Not as sad as me asking if it did. Erm yes... I got some some of that nice lavender oil stuff today - the plan in mind, is that I can use it when massaging myself; no, not a dirty massage. I mean, I'm going to learn some self-massage techniques to help relax myself. Ugh, I know that didn't make it sound any better, but innuendo can be so hard to avoid nowadays. Saying "nowadays", I've only lived for 20 years, and been aware of innuendo for 9 of them.










I'm desperate to pull a girl, god I am. I'm not sure if only people who know some English slang will get that, but it means "Sleep with a girl", in my case anyway. But it doesn't matter now, you know what I mean. But I have to say, that is not the ultimate objective in my mind, honestly. I just want to flirt, and probably bring one back to mine and cuddle and talk. What the fuck is wrong with me? I'm supposed to be a guy. Well anyway, I reckon tonight I'm probably not going to the university bar, because my mate and his girlfriend are probably kind of bored of that, since they know it'll just be me urging them to help me pull all night.

I'm off to do some revision. Bi bi.

A victory against booze

I've been 'heroic' tonight, and I've not gotten drunk. If you check the information about me, it'll mention that I'm a bit of an alcoholic. I beat the habit tonight by following a nifty plan...

I go to the gym at 9pm, and when I get back, I just wait a little (enjoying my exercise induced endorphins) until it's 11pm, and hence impossible for me to actually buy any alcoholic drink. Before I buggered this plan up, I actually was pretty stressed out in the day and decided to start getting drunk at 6pm.

You see, I'm alone in my flat and I get bored, so indulging in drink is kind of what I end up doing. I believe tomorrow I'm going to check-out some advice on-line, about beating alcoholism. My cognitive behavioural therapist told me today that it could be a clever idea to put aside the money that I'm not spending on alcohol and save it (to be spent on something nice later), and in so that hopefully may motivate me to stop getting drunk so often. I suppose little cognitive tricks like that may actually really help; because DAMN, it's so nasty to just rely on willpower.

Well anyway, today I broke the chain of about 20 nights in a row getting drunk. There was this one 'black sheep' of a night where I only got a bit tipsy, but I won't let that break the chain. I doubt my liver is worrying about this technicality. It's probably thanking the lord for this day of rest.

Yes so... I've only just started the blog and at the moment I'm just trying to get a first post done, so look at the full stop after this last word.